The Disheveled Habit of Lieutenant Columbo is a gargantuan, safe nation, ruled by Lieutenant Columbo with a fair hand, and remarkable for its irreverence towards religion, suspicion of poets, and stringent health and safety legislation. The democratic population of 16.633 billion lieutenants enjoy a sensible mix of personal and economic freedoms, while the political process is open and the people's right to vote held sacrosanct.

The medium-sized, outspoken government juggles the competing demands of Education, Welfare, and Healthcare. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of LAPD Homicide Department. The average income tax rate is 32.7%, but much higher for the wealthy.

The rumpled economy, worth 891 trillion cigars a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Tourism industry, with major contributions from Soda Sales, Uranium Mining, and Door-to-door Insurance Sales. State-owned companies are common. Average income is 53,626 cigars, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Taking hostages is a great way to influence government policy, tipsy fans frequently invite themselves to the board meetings of sports clubs, a National Academy regulates grammar and usage, and veterans are directed into environmental cleanup operations. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Lieutenant Columbo's national animal is the Basset hound and its national religion is admiring nice houses.

Lieutenant Columbo is ranked 262,712^th in the world and 5,929^th in The North Pacific for Most Cultured, scoring 59 on the Snufflebottom-Wiggendum Pentatonic Scale.